Losing Your Loved Ones

[Danielle]

On Sunday, my Grandad passed away peacefully in his sleep after a long battle with illness. He was 84 years old and lived a good life, the last few months were hard, but he is at rest now.

 

All my other grandparents died when I was just a toddler so I barely remember them so this is the first time that I have experienced bereavement in the family and I guess in 27 years, I am pretty lucky not to have done so. I am coping alright, i've had work to keep me busy but it's tough in our house at the moment and so much going on.

 

A few of you may remember, but on one of the old forums when we had blogs I wrote one about my Grandad, as he was my only living Grandparent we were very close, I loved spending time with him and listening to his stories about days gone by... born in 1925 he has lived through World War II which he spent working down the mines, he has seen the invention of the television and computers, hell he has even seen England win the World Cup! It makes me wonder how much the world will continue to change throughout my own lifetime.

 

I miss him so much and I can't stop thinking about the times spent with him, they are precious.

 

I would like to post this video of a song by one of my favourite singers in tribute, not only to my Grandad, but also to any other members' relatives who have sadly departed this life, this is for you.

 

[Monkey Cartwheels]

So sorry to hear bro.

A death in the family is terrible. But remember that grieving will not effect where they are now, it only effects you. I know it sounds almost disrespectful, but there is no need to grieve and have a peace that they are in a better place and you will join them eventually after you too have gone, that frame of mind has helped me through bad times. For example, my nana who has been a huge impact in my life and faith, she is the most dedicated Christian I know and shes been in a wheelchair for over 35yrs, shes sick and doesnt have long, Its going to be though as hell I know when she passes away, but I am also happy because she will leave to be with God and be happy for eternity and that one day I will walk with her again

 

Over my life I have also been lucky to have not been to many funerals but last year I went to 5 funerals, before that I had been to 2 that I was too young to remember. One in which I had to witness my older brother burst into tears over the loss of one of his best friends.

Funerals are tough dude, keep your chin up high.

 

I hope that I have helped to ease some pain. If not, my bad.

[flying kiwi]

I'm so sorry to here that. My grandma passed away this Monday as well, she was also ill, although we are still waiting to hear what exactly happened we know she refused a blood transfusion, so in a way can take comfort in the fact that she was ready to go. It's good that your grandad died peacefully, I hope your ok, my thoughts are with you and your family. I've also been quite lucky (to some extent) in that I have only been to two funerals in my life, my dad passed away when I was a toddler, so I dont remember that. But in the past few years my grandpa and great grandad died, funerals are hard, but they also bring closure. Although saying that I found my grandpa's a little easier as he was cremated which i found easier then watching the coffin lowered.....i suppose its quicker and a little less obvious.

 

I hope your ok xxx

[Danielle]

I'm so sorry to here that. My grandma passed away this Monday as well, she was also ill, although we are still waiting to hear what exactly happened we know she refused a blood transfusion, so in a way can take comfort in the fact that she was ready to go. It's good that your grandad died peacefully, I hope your ok, my thoughts are with you and your family. I've also been quite lucky (to some extent) in that I have only been to two funerals in my life, my dad passed away when I was a toddler, so I dont remember that. But in the past few years my grandpa and great grandad died, funerals are hard, but they also bring closure. Although saying that I found my grandpa's a little easier as he was cremated which i found easier then watching the coffin lowered.....i suppose its quicker and a little less obvious.

 

I hope your ok xxx

Thanks, I am sorry to hear the loss of your grandma too.

 

I could do without the added stress at work, it is hard to carry on as normal as if nothing as happened, but I'm coping alright, I have never been to a funeral before so it's a new experience for me, he's going to be buried in the plot alongside my nan which he brought himself after she died.

[Arie]

I am very sorry for your loss. I also lost my grandmother last week, but she was 98 and suffering. In one sense, I was happy that she was finally able to reach some peace. Dealing with death never ever gets easier. I lost my mother when I was 9 and most of my grandparents are gone as well. I think it was a beautiful idea to post something here to commemorate your grandfather. I was wondering if you would like to take it a step farther. Wouldn't it be nice to use this a special place for us all to talk about the ones we have lost? In honor of them and in order to help each other. To be able to cope with someone. I do not mean to take away from your thread in any way. But, when I saw the posts here I couldn't help thinking that maybe we all need a special place to cope. A place where we could all comfort each other.

I am so sorry for your loss. Your grandfather seems like he was a very special person. I know he is watching over you and smiling now.

[flying kiwi]

Thanks, I am sorry to hear the loss of your grandma too.

 

I could do without the added stress at work, it is hard to carry on as normal as if nothing as happened, but I'm coping alright, I have never been to a funeral before so it's a new experience for me, he's going to be buried in the plot alongside my nan which he brought himself after she died.

 

That sounds lovely thoigh, the plot alongside each other, very sweet that they will be together. I bet it will be a lovely service. It is veru hard to go on as normal, maybe work is actually a blessing in disguise though-help you take your mind off things. He does sound like he was a wonderful man who has left you with some great memories

 

Do you know when the funeral is yet? I'm still waiting to hear about my grandmas.

 

I am very sorry for your loss. I also lost my grandmother last week, but she was 98 and suffering. In one sense, I was happy that she was finally able to reach some peace. Dealing with death never ever gets easier. I lost my mother when I was 9 and most of my grandparents are gone as well. I think it was a beautiful idea to post something here to commemorate your grandfather. I was wondering if you would like to take it a step farther. Wouldn't it be nice to use this a special place for us all to talk about the ones we have lost? In honor of them and in order to help each other. To be able to cope with someone. I do not mean to take away from your thread in any way. But, when I saw the posts here I couldn't help thinking that maybe we all need a special place to cope. A place where we could all comfort each other.

I am so sorry for your loss. Your grandfather seems like he was a very special person. I know he is watching over you and smiling now.

Yeah, it is always hard to cope with loss even when we know its what was best for them, to stop their suffering. I think the best thing to do is try and remember the good times and them at their best. I think this is another reason funerals help give closure, from my experience you have a cry if needed and then once your at the wake you can talk about what life that person has led and enjoy sharing memories with others who loved them.

[sarahelizabeth]

I am sorry to hear about your Grandpa.. Death is a horrible thing but I somehow Always get over it b.c I know they would want me to be happy and still keep going in life

 

I lost my sister when i was 15 and she was 8 she died on new years of heart problems and She had the swine flu..

I also lost my boyfriend when i was 15 it was a couple months before my sister i dated him for a year and half. of my life yeah that was horrible

I lost alot more loved ones and had to see Loved Ones Go though pain I Know it will be tough for the next year or so..

 

but i promise things will always get better

[Danielle]

I am very sorry for your loss. I also lost my grandmother last week, but she was 98 and suffering. In one sense, I was happy that she was finally able to reach some peace. Dealing with death never ever gets easier. I lost my mother when I was 9 and most of my grandparents are gone as well. I think it was a beautiful idea to post something here to commemorate your grandfather. I was wondering if you would like to take it a step farther. Wouldn't it be nice to use this a special place for us all to talk about the ones we have lost? In honor of them and in order to help each other. To be able to cope with someone. I do not mean to take away from your thread in any way. But, when I saw the posts here I couldn't help thinking that maybe we all need a special place to cope. A place where we could all comfort each other.

I am so sorry for your loss. Your grandfather seems like he was a very special person. I know he is watching over you and smiling now.

Thank you for your post and I am sorry to hear about the loss of your grandmother too, it doesn't make things easier but 98 is a good innings.

 

It's a good idea to have somewhere to talk, I was in two minds about making a thread but it has definitely helped.

 

That sounds lovely thoigh, the plot alongside each other, very sweet that they will be together. I bet it will be a lovely service. It is veru hard to go on as normal, maybe work is actually a blessing in disguise though-help you take your mind off things. He does sound like he was a wonderful man who has left you with some great memories

 

Do you know when the funeral is yet? I'm still waiting to hear about my grandmas.

Not yet, something to do with the post mortem holding things up because he spent most of his working life down the mines, probably going to be the week after next now.

[Imagine]

I really hope your okay, and if you ever need to talk you know where i am

 

I lost my mum before christmas and it was a nasty shock and I still don't think I am coming to terms with it or even if i am grieving. But the big thing you need to understand is that greiving effects everyone very differently, you might even suddenly change over night or you might even feel better soon. it is strange, but grieving has no time frame but as long as you are looking after yourself you will soon start to remember all the amazing memories and you will start to forget that he isnt physically here anymore.

 

But remember, our loved ones never truly leave us. They stay with you forever and that thought comforts me so i hope it comforts you.

 

*hugs*

[Lady Deadpool]

Losing a beloved someone is always a terrible loss. And i know it helps talking about it with people who have been there but the only cure really, is time. I've lost my 2 grandmas and one of grandads in a short period of time, and i also lost a friend of mine from skin cancer long time ago. All of them suffered from a desease, and much as i wanted them to stay, dying for them was a relief. I'm glad to hear your grandpa died peacefully.

What i know is that in the beginning you can't realise what's going on. Later on you realise you want them back and you can't live without them. No matter who i talked to for comfort, i didn't feel any better. But after time you see that, that's life. We're all gonna die at some point. And it's dreadful losing a beloved one, but there are still people who love us left behind.

 

Here let me dedicate that song as well. I've been listening to it a lot for the past couple years. I hope you feel good sometime soon love.

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AtHXM6v59JI